But the fruit of the Holy Spirit (the work which His presence within accomplishes) is love, joy (gladness), peace, patience (an even temper, forbearance), kindness, goodness (benevolence), faithfulness, Gentleness (meekness, humility), self-control (self-restraint, continence). Against such things there is no law – Galatians 5:22-23
I will keep this scripture within the relationship context but it suffices to emphasize that it is ONE fruit, manifesting in 9 ways. You cannot claim to ONLY have some…you cannot love and not be gentle. You cannot love and lack patience. You cannot claim to have LOVE and be unfaithful. Any form of love that is devoid of the other constituents of the fruit is perverted. Buying a tire does not mean you have a car even if having a car means you have tires.
So as people filled with the Spirit of God, His spirit in us gives us the ability to exhibit these 9 characteristics that are intertwined into one…the fruit of the spirit.
Having this 9-in-1 fruit should reflect in everything we do. The way we talk, the things we do, how we relate with others, how we treat people. You cannot be a spirit-filled Christian and be a mean boss…you cannot be the gentle easy going person in church and be the “anger-is-my-middle-name” husband. It does not have an on/off switch that you control at will.
Since the fruit of the spirit permeates every area of our lives as Christians, it should also show in our relationship; be it dating or marriage.
This will be a 9-part series talking about each constituent of the fruit of the spirit as it relates to our relationships.
The first constituent is LOVE…we all claim to know about this. We all talk about it but how many of us really know LOVE?
The Bible tells us what love isn’t in 1st Corinthians 13:1-3
If I [can] speak in the tongues of men and [even] of angels, but have not love (that reasoning, intentional, spiritual devotion such as is inspired by God’s love for and in us), I am only a noisy gong or a clanging cymbal.
Love is not necessarily “spiritual eloquence”
And if I have prophetic powers (the gift of interpreting the divine will and purpose), and understand all the secret truths and mysteries and possess all knowledge, and if I have faith so that I can remove mountains, but have not love (God’s love in me) I am nothing.
Love is not necessarily “spiritual muscle flexing”
Even if I dole out all that I have (to the poor in providing) food, and if I surrender my body to be burned or in order that I may glory, but have not love (God’s love in me), I gain nothing.
Love is not necessarily Charity
The Bible also tells us, in the same 1 Corinthians 13:4-8, the things that show that indeed we have God’s love in us and ways to show it to those around us…in this context, our partners.
“Love endures long and is patient and kind; love never is envious nor boils over with jealousy, is not boastful or vainglorious, does not display itself haughtily.
It is not conceited (arrogant and inflated with pride); it is not rude (unmannerly) and does not act unbecomingly. Love (God’s love in us) does not insist on its own rights or its own way, for it is not self-seeking; it is not touchy or fretful or resentful; it takes no account of the evil done to it [it pays no attention to a suffered wrong].
It does not rejoice at injustice and unrighteousness, but rejoices when right and truth prevail.
Love bears up under anything and everything that comes, is ever ready to believe the best of every person, its hopes are fadeless under all circumstances, and it endures everything [without weakening].
Love never fails [never fades out or becomes obsolete or comes to an end]”.
My God! I guess that’s why God commanded husbands to love their wives.
So the next time you say “I love you” to your partner…be sure you truly do.
May God help us to grow in love with our spouses and partners…may He grant us grace to love indeed in Jesus’ name.
It is not an easy feat but it is achievable and it is a process.
We’ll be talking about the 2nd constituent (JOY) next…until then, I will keep working with God to love my wife the way He commanded.
To the unmarried, you will not ‘shi-marry’ in Jesus’ name.
To the married, may God continue to uphold your marriage in Jesus’ name.
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