I smile, though unhappy

Gay right activists are celebrating
Moralists are objecting and vexing
The ones who understand times and seasons are shaking their heads and smiling 

It's an "unhappy smile" but still we smile because "now salvation is nearer to us than when we first believed". 

We smile because we know this is not a war that can be won in the court. 

We smile because we know that no amount of ranting will change this
It's all part of His plan...just like Jesus said in Luke 21:9, These things MUST happen...

The whole world is fast becoming uninhabitable for God's children and His spirit...these things must happen. Nothing can stop it.

God is unhappy but that will not stop what He's about to do. It's time to tell our friends and family and anyone that cares to listen about what is imminent. 

We can rant and do all sorts but this is what the Bible suggests at a time like this
"This is all the more urgent, for you know how late it is; time is running out. Wake up, for our salvation is nearer now than when we first believed. The night is almost gone; the day of salvation will soon be here. So remove your dark deeds like dirty clothes, and put on the shining armor of right living. Because we belong to the day, we must live decent lives for all to see. Don't participate in the darkness of wild parties and drunkenness, or in sexual promiscuity and immoral living, or in quarreling and jealousy. Instead, clothe yourself with the presence of the Lord Jesus Christ. And don't let yourself think about ways to indulge your evil desires" -Romans 13:11-14
This implies that I need to put my own house in order FIRST. I need to make sure that I don't get disqualified on that day. I need to work out MY OWN salvation with fear and trembling.
What shall it profit me if I spend my whole life condemning gay people and not make it at the end of the day?

I am not homophobic and I don't hate gay people...as a matter of fact I pray for those I know, that God will touch their hearts before it's too late.

Events are unfolding all around the world, they all seem unrelated but soon the dots will be connected. Time to strap in, it's about to get bumpy

I smile, though unhappy...Come, Lord Jesus come

Picture credit (c) colourbox

How do you handle your 'Nabal'?

How do you handle your Nabal?
To understand where I’m coming from, let me share the story in 1 Samuel 25:2-35

A very rich man was in Maon, whose possessions and business were in Carmel. He had 3,000 sheep and 1,000 goats, and he was shearing his sheep in Carmel.

The man’s name was Nabal and his wife’s name was Abigail; she was a woman of good understanding, and beautiful. But the man was rough and evil in his doings; he was a Calebite.

David heard in the wilderness that Nabal was shearing his sheep.
And David sent out ten young men and said to them, Go up to Carmel to Nabal and greet him in my name; And salute him thus: Peace be to you and to your house and to all that you have. I have heard that you have shearers. Now your shepherds have been with us and we did them no harm, and they missed nothing all the time they were in Carmel.

Ask your young men and they will tell you. Therefore let my young men find favor in your sight, for we come at an opportune time. I pray you, give whatever you have at hand to your servants and to your son David.
And when David’s young men came, they said all this to Nabal in the name of David, and then paused.

And Nabal answered David’s servants and said, Who is David? Who is the son of Jesse? There are many servants nowadays who are each breaking away from his master. Shall I then take my bread and my water, and my meat that I have killed for my shearers, and give it to men when I do not know where they belong? So David’s young men turned away, and came and told him all that was said.
And David said to his men, Every man gird on his sword. And they did so, and David also girded on his sword; and there went up after David about 400 men, and 200 remained with the baggage. But one of Nabal’s young men told Abigail, Nabal’s wife, Behold, David sent messengers out of the wilderness to salute our master, and he railed at them. But David’s men were very good to us, and we were not harmed, nor did we miss anything as long as we went with them, when we were in the fields. They were a wall to us night and day, all the time we were with them keeping the sheep. So know this and consider what you will do, for evil is determined against our master and all his house. For he is such a wicked man that one cannot speak to him.

Then Abigail made haste and took 200 loaves, two skins of wine, five sheep already dressed, five measures of parched grain, 100 clusters of raisins, and 200 cakes of figs, and laid them on donkeys. And she said to her servants, Go on before me; behold, I come after you. But she did not tell her husband Nabal.

As she rode on her donkey, she came down hidden by the mountain, and behold, David and his men came down opposite her, and she met them. Now David had said, Surely in vain have I protected all that this fellow has in the wilderness, so that nothing was missed of all that belonged to him; and he has repaid me evil for good. May God do so, and more also, to David if I leave of all who belong to him one male alive by morning.

When Abigail saw David, she hastened and lighted off the donkey, and fell before David on her face and did obeisance. Kneeling at his feet she said, Upon me alone let this guilt be, my lord. And let your handmaid, I pray you, speak in your presence, and hear the words of your handmaid. Let not my lord, I pray you, regard this foolish and wicked fellow Nabal, for as his name is, so is he - Nabal [foolish, wicked] is his name, and folly is with him. But I, your handmaid, did not see my lord’s young men whom you sent. So now, my lord, as the Lord lives and as your soul lives, seeing that the Lord has prevented you from bloodguiltiness and from avenging yourself with your own hand, now let your enemies and those who seek to do evil to my lord be as Nabal. And now this gift, which your handmaid has brought my lord, let it be given to the young men who follow my lord.
Forgive, I pray you, the trespass of your handmaid, for the Lord will certainly make my lord a sure house, because my lord is fighting the Lord’s battles, and evil has not been found in you all your days.

Though man is risen up to pursue you and to seek your life, yet the life of my lord shall be bound in the living bundle with the Lord your God. And the lives of your enemies—them shall He sling out as out of the center of a sling. And when the Lord has done to my lord according to all the good that He has promised concerning you and has made you ruler over Israel, This shall be no staggering grief to you or cause for pangs of conscience to my lord, either that you have shed blood without cause or that my lord has avenged himself. And when the Lord has dealt well with my lord, then earnestly remember your handmaid.

And David said to Abigail, Blessed be the Lord, the God of Israel, Who sent you this day to meet me. And blessed be your discretion and advice, and blessed be you who have kept me today from bloodguiltiness and from avenging myself with my own hand. For as the Lord, the God of Israel, lives, Who has prevented me from hurting you, if you had not hurried and come to meet me, surely by morning there would not have been left so much as one male to Nabal.

So David accepted what she had brought him and said to her, Go up in peace to your house. See, I have hearkened to your voice and have granted your petition

Take Abigail out of this story and the outcome would have been different and gory.

Replace Abigail with a woman lacking wisdom or one that could care less and I'm sure even David would have regretted the outcome.

As men, we act Foolish sometimes…we believe we know everything and we have figured it out. We try to rationalize things and we want to match requirements to disbursements. God made up for this ‘inadequacy’ by providing a woman to help make up for such shortcomings. 

The Bible described Nabal (Abigail’s husband) as a rich man but “mean-spirited and of evil deeds”. Even his servants said of him in verse 17 “He is such a wicked man that no one can talk to him”.
Regardless of these, Abigail was a good wife and a wise woman. She was:

Loving

Patient

Disciplined

Hardworking

Efficient

Organized

Discerning

Blessed with a gentle disposition

Blessed with pleasant speech (she said the right words).

The way she was able to arrange a ‘peace offering’ for David and his army within such a short notice speaks volume of her resourcefulness and organizational skills. 3 times in the passage the phrase “she made haste” was used.
She saw that her husband had made a big error…she didn’t pick that time to confront him. She chose to fix the potentially dangerous blunder first. She was able to defuse a 'ticking time bomb'.
She was able to give a soft answer and say the right thing to calm an angry David down. Proverbs 15:1 says “A gentle answer turns away wrath”
She was able to remind David of the scripture “Do not answer a fool according to his folly, or you yourself will be just like him” Proverbs 26:4

She recognized the need to humble herself and plead the cause of her husband before David and was willing to do so.
She risked her life, going to meet an angry David who had an army. Abigail was a courageous woman and her motive was to plead for the lives of others. She desired to protect the innocent people that worked for Nabal.
Abigail, is an example of a woman whom God has specifically held up as a pattern of right behavior in an unfortunate marriage. She could not have known that thousands of years later people in similar circumstances would find a role model in her and dare to do the impossible because of her, but God knew.

If you read the story further, you would see how she was repaid for her wisdom.

“Never let the evil disposition of one mate hinder the devotion and grace of the other. Never let the difficulties of your home lead you to abdicate your throne. Do not step down to the level of your circumstances, but lift them to your own high calling in Christ. ‘Be not conformed... but be ye transformed’ (Rom. 12:1, 2).” – F.B. Meyer

If you are married to a 'Nabal', how are you handling it?




N.B. This does not apply to a case of Physical abuse, if you are in a physically or emotionally abusive marriage/relationship…seek help

picture credit (c) walk-by-faith.com

Kingdom Husbands

A kingdom Husband is one who recognizes that he may be in charge but was put in charge and will one day give account.
A kingdom husband is a leader in the home not a boss.
A kingdom husband doesn't bully.
A kingdom husband doesn't abuse his position and power

Sir, if your daughter(s) cannot pray for a husband like you...you have failed in the office of 'husbandhood'. Be the kind of man you pray for your daughter(s)

Sir, a man is not a senior boy, a man is not a big boy, a man is not a home boy...a man is a man. Are you a man?

 

‎"I'm simply being a man" is your excuse. Which "How to be a man" manual said that men need to be callous, mean, insensitive and unfaithful to be men? Real Men are responsible and dependable. Stop being a boy and grow up sir 

 

‎Sir, you cannot play a good father to excuse yourself from being a good husband. You cannot buy your children's love, you may confuse them with the gifts but they will see the deception when the time comes. Truth is, once you are a good husband...it takes care of everything else.

 

‎Sir, what else do you need to know about a girl that KNOWS you are married and still sleeps with you? You are simply trading gold for coal and smiling...if she cheats with you, she will definitely cheat on you.

 

‎Sir, that woman you ill-treat is someone's dream woman...they will literally jump at the offer to take her off your hands. Stop thinking you're doing her a favor being with her.

 

‎You treat your wife like trash but throw a fit when your sister is treated the same way...Dude! What goes around

 

Husbands, in the same way be considerate as you live with your wives, and treat them with respect as the weaker partner and as heirs with you of the gracious gift of life, so that nothing will hinder your prayers -1 Peter 3:7

 

Husbands, love your wives and be not bitter against them; turning love into hatred of their persons; ruling with rigour, and in a tyrannical manner; behaving towards them in a morose, churlish, and ill natured way; giving them either bitter words, or blows, and denying them their affection, care, provision, protection, and assistance, but using them as servants, or worse. All which is barbarous, brutish, and unchristian, and utterly unbecoming the Gospel - Gill's Exposition of Colossians 3:19

 

picture credit (c) Godly Husbands Kingdom Living

Is It Your Life?

One of the most potent tools the devil is using in this generation is making people believe

They own their lives.

They decide what happens to them.

That somehow they are in control.

That nobody should tell them what to do.

You hear people say things like

"Don't tell me what to do"

"I do what I want"

"It's my life"

Is it really?

Are you really in control?

If you have power over the choices but cannot determine the outcome, if you do what you want but cannot control the consequences...does that not put someone else in control?

If someone cuts you spare keys to a house, does that make you the OWNER of that house? 

Especially when this person has the key to the gates of the house, which he did not cut for you btw. 

Sure you can come in anytime you want and do whatever you want..but the day this person chooses to LOCK the gate, that's the day you realize that the keys you have are useless if someone else determines access to where you can use your keys.

"For men will be lovers of self, lovers of money, boastful, arrogant, revilers, disobedient to parents, ungrateful, unholy, unloving, irreconcilable, malicious gossips, without self-control, brutal, haters of good, treacherous, reckless, conceited, lovers of pleasure rather than lovers of God, holding to a form of godliness, although they have denied its power" -2 Timothy 3:2-4

I ask once again, are you really in CONTROL?

Picture Credit (c) 3mens.deviantart.com

The Fruit Of The Spirit...The Relationship Perspective (GOODNESS)

I won’t even bother going into the dictionary meaning of the word goodness.

The word good has been debased because everyone has their own standard of what qualifies as good…however, as children of God, we should decide what is right and wrong based on His word. I saw this on someone’s page and loved it “What is good? Only God has the supreme authority to define good and evil”
 
We should be wary of the society’s idea/definition of ‘good’…Isaiah 5:20 says “What sorrow for those who say that evil is good and good is evil, that dark is light and light is dark, that bitter is sweet and sweet is bitter”

The Greek word translated “goodness,” agathosune, is defined as "uprightness of heart and life." It doesn’t just refer to an attitude or a motivation, but a lifestyle characterized by virtue and helpfulness.

Someone defined goodness as doing the right thing for the right reason
Goodness is virtue and holiness in action.

It is how you show who/what you claim to be.

It is the moral characteristic of someone who claims to be filled with the Spirit of God.
 
Goodness is not a quality that a man can just pick up; we know that God is good so it takes the Spirit of God to help a person be good.

Everyone can be good as a form of reciprocation but by God’s standard; we are to do good and be good even to those who hate us…to those we consider undeserving of it.

It is God, through the work of the Holy Spirit in us, who reproduces His goodness in our hearts and ultimately in our lives.

It takes a life that abides in Him to bear the fruit of goodness. “Abide in Me, and I in you. As the branch cannot bear fruit of itself, unless it abides in the vine, neither can you, unless you abide in Me. I am the vine, you are the branches. He who abides in Me, and I in him, bears much fruit; for without Me you can do nothing”- John 15:1-2

According to Ephesians 5:8-10, some other words like truth, righteousness, justice and light are used as synonyms for goodness: “For you were once darkness, but now you are light in the Lord. Walk as children of light (for the fruit of the Spirit is in all goodness, righteousness, and truth), finding out what is acceptable to the Lord.” They go hand-in-hand, goodness that is devoid of truth, righteousness, justice and light is mere niceness.

A spouse being good/living out ‘goodness’ in a marriage seems like a no brainer…but come to think of it, is this always the case?
How beautiful it would be, if we appropriated this virtue (goodness) in our marriages and relationships…it enables a person to be a good husband, a good wife, a good fiancée, a good fiancé.

As Christians in God-centered marriages/relationships, we are supposed to mirror Christ to our spouse/partner…

We should BE GOOD.

How?

·        By being willing to serve not just be served.

·        By being truthful in words, deeds and intentions

We should DO GOOD

How?

·        By encouraging our spouses/partners when they have things they are struggling with. We should show our support and let them know that we believe in them

·        By knowing what refreshes our spouses/partners when they are spent/drained physically and emotionally; and making it happen

·        By making life a little easier for them…helping in any way we can

We should STIR GOOD

How?

·        By encouraging our spouses/partners to get closer to God (since He is the source of goodness)

·        By praying for our spouses/partners

·        By encouraging them into godly friendships/alliances

·        By encouraging them from the word of God  

So when you feel your spouse/partner has crossed the line and you are plotting a way to ‘deal with’ him or her…let goodness well up inside of you. Remember that you are God’s handiwork, created in Jesus Christ to do good works (Ephesians 2:10); Just like a cup of water spills water when bumped; a child of God who is filled with the Spirit should spill goodness when shoved.

Don’t ever get to a point where you feel you have been too good to your spouse/partner for too long and you start to consider withdrawing the goodness. “So let's not get tired of doing what is good. At just the right time we will reap a harvest of blessing if we don't give up” (Galatians 6:9). Another version says “And when we do what is good, let it not be tedious to us…”

Work on your heart…the Bible actually enjoins us to GUARD our hearts. Watch what you feed your heart; watch if it fosters goodness or evil. Stay connected to the source of goodness…you cannot give what you do not have. “A good man brings good things out of the good stored up in his heart…” – Luke 6:45

Part of being good to your spouse/partner is being sincere with them. No hypocrisy, don’t pretend to like what you don’t and don’t lie when they ask for your opinion (letting our words be seasoned with salt is not the same as lying) Romans 12:9 says “Love must be sincere. Hate what is evil; cling to what is good”

Let your motives be right…one of the key differences between goodness and niceness is motive. Doing it for the right reason. Don’t do good to impress, do it to glorify God. Matthew 5:16 says “…let your light shine before others, that they may see your good deeds and glorify your Father in heaven”.
Goodness should ultimately bring glory to God not just commendations to the person being good.

Is there something you consider evil in your spouse/partner? Use goodness to overcome it. Our expressions of goodness diminish or negate the effects of evil in the world. “Don’t let evil conquer you, but conquer evil by doing good” Romans12:21

Be fair when dealing with your spouse. Put yourself in his/her shoes from time to time.

Goodness is motivated by a desire to please God…when you deal with your spouse/partner with a desire to please God, you can never be ‘found wanting’ in the area of goodness. Whatever is happening between you and your partner let your desire be to please God.

The Bible says “a good tree cannot bear bad fruit, nor can a bad tree bear good fruit…” however this is the good news, Matthew 12:33 says “Make a tree good and its fruit will be good, or make a tree bad and its fruit will be bad, for a tree is recognized by its fruit”.

Allow the Spirit of God to work in you, and you will bear the fruit of goodness…as this fruit of goodness is displayed through you, the two of you will experience greater joy and connection with each other and God and your marriage will be better for it.

Time for me to go work on being good to, doing good for and stirring good in my wife…so help me God


Note: If you are in an abusive relationship (Physical or Emotional), seek professional help

Picture Credit (c) robyncobb.com