I had missed Bayo so much and although he would call me on the landline like every evening, I just wished I could see him. I lived in Ibadan but he lived in Lagos.
He paid me a surprise visit after about a month…it was a surprise because we had talked a night before and he never said anything about visiting. This was a guy that had never really been to Ibadan but he was able to find his way. He said he found my address through the Telephone Directory.
I introduced him to my sisters (I had told them a lot about him and they were already dying to meet him), he also met my mom but my dad wasn’t home ( It’s not like I would have introduced him to my dad anyways. “The love no shack me reach that level”).
He brought a bowl of ice cream which fetched him the nickname “Ice-cream Guy”.
After the strike was called off, I rushed back to school but Bayo didn’t show up until after a week. Nothing made sense until he came. I had missed and wanted to see him so badly.
He arrived finally; it was on a Tuesday evening. I was in my room when I heard my hostel friends laughing and shouting “wọn ti dé o” (he is here).
Before I could get to the door, Bayo was already knocking. I opened up, saw him and just jumped at him. I broke a lot of rules that day but Bayo kept his cool…he stayed a gentleman and didn’t go all the way. He said I was letting my emotions cloud my better judgment. I was just too happy to see him and was ready to show it.
He stayed till very late and I almost cried when he was about to leave.
“I’m here now…will see you tomorrow” he told me when I wouldn’t let go of his hand at the bust stop.
I believe that was how we started dating…we both felt it and went with the flow. We were inseparable and like the best couple on campus. Bayo was either in my room or I was in his…we lived like five kilometers apart.
There was a day we were studying in my room, Bayo looked in my eyes and said
“I’ll never hurt you…I couldn't even if I tried”
That statement melted my heart. He didn’t even have to say it; he had proven it time after time. I threw caution to the wind and broke those rules again but again, he had more self-control and we ended up not doing “it”.
In my 2nd year…middle of 2nd semester, Bayo had travelled home that weekend and on arrival, came straight to my hostel.
The look on his face could freeze the sun.
He said we had to talk, so we went to his house.
He told me his dad had secured admission for him in a school at the United Kingdom and would be travelling very soon. It came as a shock to him too because his dad wanted it to be a surprise.
I was blank and didn’t know what to say for almost thirty minutes…the thought of Bayo not being there just couldn’t find a place in my head.
When I finally opened my mouth to talk, I cried instead.
Bayo held me very tight and comforted me…he didn’t have many words that day. I’m not sure what happened next but before I knew it, one thing led to the other and we went from holding each other to kissing passionately and sleeping with each other. Right there with tears in our eyes, Bayo deflowered me as we held on to each other.
It was his first time too…I slept in his house that day. I stared at the ceiling all night…my mind was busy with probabilities and statistics.
How could something so perfect be ending right before my eyes?
I had heard different stories about boyfriends that traveled abroad, making all the promises in the world, but it was just a matter of time before distance killed the feeling.
My eldest sister had had a similar experience…her first boyfriend traveled to the United Stated and promised to come back for her. After a few letters and phone calls, the relationship fizzled out.
It was as if Bayo was reading my mind because the next morning, he sat me down and we talked for a long time.
“You know I love you with all my heart…right?
You know I wouldn’t allow this, if it was within my power…right?
When my dad told me about it, I was more of confused than excited and it’s because of you.
As he broke the news, the first thing that came to my mind was ‘us’.
I’ll do my best to make this work, I promise...but if you are scared of waiting, I’ll understand”
He went on and on but I didn’t say much…I wasn’t prepared for it, even in my wildest imaginations so I had nothing.
When I got back to my hostel, my hostel friends knew something was wrong.
They started asking all sorts of questions…I never bothered to answer them.
I could only confide in Bukky, my course mate/roommate. She told me to follow my heart (whatever that meant) but also warned me to be cautious.
Bayo had three weeks before traveling…we spent it together. It was like spending time with a close relative that was dying from a terminal disease.
Joy and sorrow had coalesced and it was a perfect union, I enjoyed every moment spent with him but my heart broke with every passing second because it drew me close to the inevitable.
Bayo wanted me to come to the airport with him but I couldn’t handle it…so I said my goodbye at my room and it hurt so bad.
I cried for a whole week after he left. By this time, my hostel friends had known what was happening and they were there to support me.
They told different stories, from fictitious to ridiculous, of how love conquers everything, including distance. I just nodded along and silently prayed in my heart that God should help me.
I got a letter from Bayo about 3 weeks later and it was like a letter from God Himself, hand delivered by an angel…I read it over and over and over again.
There were lots of promises and declaration of love in the letter…he also sent his phone number.
I would call him once in a while from the NITEL payphone on campus.
My first day at home, after my 2nd semester exams, Bayo called me and we talked for over 3 hours. It was so nice to hear his voice again…he had a lot of “gist” for me.
How the University system there was totally different from the Nigerian system.
How he had problems with his Ghanaian roommate who in his words “just couldn’t stand Nigerians and their arrogance”.
It felt so good and I was reassured that we could pull through...there was even a time that Bayo even sent me gifts (lots of gifts) and cards through a friend that went to the UK for vacation.
We kept at it for about a year, then the frequency of the calls and letters started waning.
I would call and get Bayo’s answering machine…I would leave him messages.
I would leave detailed messages, stating when I would be home so he could call but no calls came.
It was beginning to look like what my sister experienced but I just didn’t wanna believe that Bayo, my Bayo, could do that.
