Can These Bones Live?

In Ezekiel 37, the prophet stands in a valley filled with dry bones...lifeless, scattered, and seemingly beyond restoration. Yet God asks him, "Can these bones live?" Ezekiel wisely responds, "Sovereign Lord, you alone know."

This vision was about Israel’s restoration but also serves as a powerful metaphor for marriages that seem beyond repair. There are unions so broken, so devoid of love, trust, and connection, that they appear like those bones—dried out, fragmented, and incapable of revival. But if God has declared life over a marriage, no situation is too far gone.

However, notice that the bones didn’t instantly transform into a living army. There was a process, an ordered reconstruction dictated by God’s word. In the same way, when God restores a marriage, He often does so in stages, with each step carrying deep significance.

Bone to Bone – Rebuilding the Structure The first thing God did was bring bone to bone. This speaks of restoring alignment and foundation. In marriage, this could mean returning to God’s original design—realigning priorities, rebuilding broken trust, reestablishing roles, and acknowledging each other’s place in the covenant. It is a time of reconnecting, reordering, and reaffirming commitment.

Sinew – Strengthening the Bond Next came the sinews, the tendons that hold the bones together. Sinews signify the strength and resilience needed to sustain a marriage. This could mean reintroducing communication, rebuilding emotional intimacy, and strengthening spiritual unity. Just as sinews keep the body from falling apart, these elements ensure that a marriage doesn’t crumble under pressure.

Flesh – Restoring What Was Lost The flesh came next, covering the bones and sinews. Flesh represents the outward expressions of love, affection, and care. In a resurrected marriage, this might be the return of tenderness, kindness, and the small acts of love that once defined the relationship. It is the rekindling of what made the marriage thrive in the first place.

Skin – Protection and Covering After the flesh, the skin covered them. Skin protects and keeps everything intact. In a restored marriage, this could symbolize setting boundaries, guarding the relationship from external threats, and covering each other in prayer and grace. It is a sign of preservation and commitment to maintaining what God is rebuilding.

The Breath of God – True Restoration Even after all these steps, the bodies remained lifeless until the breath of God entered them. This final act was the defining moment—without it, they were fully formed but still without life. The breath represents the Spirit of God, the very essence that revives, empowers, and sustains a marriage. A marriage can be structurally repaired, emotionally mended, and externally restored, but without God’s Spirit, it will lack true life. His breath brings love, joy, peace, and purpose back into the union.

Speaking as God Commanded – Choosing Faith Over the Obvious Ezekiel prophesied as he was commanded. He didn’t argue with reality; he spoke God’s word over what appeared lifeless. In marriage, this means choosing to believe God’s promises over the visible ruins. It is declaring restoration when everything looks hopeless, standing firm on His word even when emotions and circumstances say otherwise.

If God has declared life over a marriage, no matter how dry the bones are, restoration is possible. But it happens through a process—realigning, strengthening, restoring, protecting, and finally, being revived by His Spirit. Our part is to trust, obey, and speak as He commands. His part is to breathe life into what seemed long dead, turning brokenness into a testimony of His power.

What is God saying about that seemingly lifeless marriage?

#BeBetter #LoveBetter #DoBetter #MarriageWorks

Silent Marriage Killers: Mobilizing a Mob Against Your Spouse

Marriage is a journey of highs and lows, love and conflict, unity and misunderstanding. But one of the most subtle yet dangerous habits that can erode its foundation is the tendency to run to friends and family to build a case against your spouse after a fight.

Saw a video recently - a candid conversation between a husband and wife in a car. The husband asked, "Why do you never complain about me to your friends after we fight?" The wife's response was profound:

"Maybe that’s the reason we are together for so long. It’s not like I’ve never done it before. Actually, it feels good to vent and get people to take your side. But over time, I realized that I was actually hurting both of you. I go to my friends, talk badly about you, and leave a bad image of you in their eyes. Meanwhile, I gather them all on my side. But somehow, you and I always end up fixing things. How would you feel as a friend?"

The husband paused. "Hmmm… betrayed."

And that’s exactly what happens. When we air out our conflicts to friends or family, seeking validation rather than resolution, we subtly betray the sacredness of marriage. We poison the perception others have of our spouse, making them judge someone who was never their enemy to begin with. And then - when the fight is over and love restores the bond - those friends and family are left with lingering bitterness that we, in our emotional moment, planted.

The Bible warns us about this:

• "A fool gives full vent to his spirit, but a wise man quietly holds it back." (Proverbs 29:11)
• "The one who covers over an offense seeks love, but whoever repeats the matter separates close friends." (Proverbs 17:9)

Of course, this is not to say we should suffer in silence, especially in cases of emotional abuse, domestic violence, or persistent harm. Seeking wise counsel is biblical (Proverbs 11:14). There is a difference between seeking help and mobilizing a mob.

One is about wisdom. The other is about pride.

Many times, we don’t share to seek godly counsel - we share to be the ‘good guy’ in the story. We’re not looking for healing; we’re looking for an audience that will nod in agreement, reinforcing our feelings while tarnishing the reputation of our spouse.

But marriage is not a courtroom. There are no prosecutors, no jurors, and no closing arguments. It is a covenant...one built on love, forgiveness, and the willingness to keep choosing each other even after disagreement.

The wife in the video ended with these words:

"At the end of the day, the relationship belongs to you and me. Who knows better than you and me in this relationship? So what’s the point of bringing in another person for an opinion?"

What a powerful perspective.

So, the next time conflict arises, pause. Pray. Seek wisdom, not validation. Ask yourself: Am I sharing to heal, or am I sharing to hurt? Because what you say in a moment of frustration may echo in the hearts of those listening long after you and your spouse have made peace.

#BeBetter #LoveBetter #DoBetter #MarriageWorks

There Is No ‘Because’—Obedience Over Justification

A Christian woman once sat across from a preacher, venting her frustration:

"I’ve become mean to my husband... because he has been mean to me for so long."

The preacher’s response was sharp but true:

"Let’s stop at ‘I am mean.’ There is no ‘because.’ God doesn’t care about the ‘because’ when we do not follow His instructions."

That statement cuts deep. How often do we justify our actions with a because?

Saul had a because when he offered the sacrifice Samuel was supposed to offer (1 Samuel 13:8-14).

Adam had a because when he blamed Eve for his disobedience (Genesis 3:12).

We all have a because when we react in ways that contradict God’s Word.

But will God accept it?

Do Not Repay Evil with Evil

"Repay no one evil for evil... If it is possible, as much as depends on you, live peaceably with all men. Beloved, do not avenge yourselves..." — Romans 12:17-19

God’s standard for our actions is not determined by how others treat us. His instruction is clear: Do not repay evil with evil. When we react sinfully because someone else sinned first, we are no longer standing in obedience - we are merely mirroring the world.

When a spouse neglects, disrespects, or wounds us, the flesh cries out for justice. The temptation is to retaliate—to give as good (or as bad) as we got. But what does God require?

"Do not be overcome by evil, but overcome evil with good." — Romans 12:21

This doesn’t mean tolerating abuse or remaining in a harmful situation. But it does mean refusing to let someone else’s wrongdoing pull us into sin. It means choosing obedience over justification.

What Should a Christian Do When Their Spouse Fails?

1. Respond in the Spirit, Not the Flesh - Galatians 5:22-23 reminds us that the fruit of the Spirit includes patience, kindness, and self-control. Reacting in anger or bitterness only feeds division. Instead, ask: How can I honor God in this moment?

2. Confront with Truth, Not Vengeance - Jesus never avoided difficult conversations (Matthew 18:15-17), but He always spoke truth in love. Address the issue with your spouse, but don’t weaponize your words.

3. Pray for Their Transformation, Not Just Their Punishment - It’s easy to pray that God punishes our spouse. It’s harder to pray for their heart, their struggles, and their journey with Christ. Yet, that is what love does (Luke 6:27-28).

4. Set Boundaries, Not Traps - If your spouse’s actions are harming the marriage, biblical wisdom calls for boundaries (Proverbs 4:23). However, boundaries should guide them toward righteousness, not trap them in a cycle of shame and guilt.

No ‘Because’—Just Obedience

When we stand before God, He won’t ask, “But what did your spouse do first?” He will ask if we obeyed His Word.

"If you love me, keep my commands." — John 14:15

There is no ‘because.’ There is only obedience. Will we choose it?

#BeBetter #LoveBetter #DoBetter #MarriageWorks 

Intimacy or Manipulation? The Thin Line in Conflict Resolution

Social media is filled with videos captioned: How I apologize to my husband when he’s mad at me. You’ve probably seen them - wives subtly removing layers under the covers, giving their husbands a very clear invitation, using intimacy as a shortcut to peace.

At first glance, it may seem harmless, even endearing. After all, intimacy is a gift in marriage, a means of connection, of breaking down walls, of reaffirming love. But let’s be honest...there’s a thin line between using intimacy to restore connection and using it to escape accountability.

Sex as a Shortcut to Reconciliation?

Marriage is built on love and commitment, but it thrives on trust and communication. Conflict is natural in any relationship, and how we handle it matters. Intimacy can be a beautiful expression of love and a way to draw near to each other after a difficult moment. But when used as a distraction from genuine repentance, it becomes a tool of avoidance rather than healing.

According to scripture, marriage should be a place of truth Ephesians 4:25 says  "Therefore each of you must put off falsehood and speak truthfully...". Using physical connection to bypass difficult conversations may bring momentary relief, but it does not foster true unity.

The Difference Between Reconnection and Manipulation

The heart behind an action often reveals whether it is reconciliation or manipulation. Consider these questions:

• Is intimacy being used to invite reconnection so that deeper healing can follow?
• Has there been a sincere effort to acknowledge wrongdoing and make amends?
• Does one partner feel obligated to accept intimacy as a replacement for an actual apology?

A biblical approach to conflict doesn’t sweep things under the carpet of orgasms. True love seeks to repair, not just reset. 1 Corinthians 13:6 reminds us that love "does not delight in evil but rejoices with the truth." Real connection comes when we walk in honesty, even when it’s uncomfortable.

Accountability: A Sign of Maturity in Marriage

A heart that values the relationship will embrace accountability. It will seek to make things right, not just make things quiet. Apologizing with words, taking responsibility, and genuinely working toward understanding shows a desire for growth. Intimacy is then restored as an overflow of that unity, rather than a Band-Aid/Plaster covering an unresolved issue.

Marriage was never meant to be built on performance-based acceptance. True oneness - spiritually, emotionally, and physically - flourishes when both partners commit to honesty, vulnerability, and accountability. So let’s not confuse reconciliation with evasion. Let’s build marriages where both intimacy and integrity thrive together.

#BeBetter #LoveBetter #DoBetter #MarriageWorks