Pastor
Jeff turned to me and said “Brother
Niran, I know you have prayed about this…but can you go pray some more, in
light of this revelation and let me know what you decide?”
I
wanted to decline the offer but he insisted…he said he knew why he said so and
I should just obey. I felt so much pity for Funmi and something in me wanted to
make up for all the hurts that life had thrown her way. I did not even bother
to pray about anything…I just wanted to take Funmi straight to my mum, get
her blessings and get married.
When
Pastor Fred asked if I had prayed and made a decision, I said yes and that God
had told me to go ahead.
That
was how it became official…Funmi met my mum some weeks after that and it was
love at first sight. My mum couldn’t hide her feelings; she hugged me and said
she was proud of me…that just like my father, I knew how to find a good woman.
Not
long after that, we started to plan the wedding…I couldn’t tell who was happier
between Elder Sam and my mum.
We
(Funmi and I) went through the counselling program for intending couples at the
church, but I was more concerned with giving her the perfect wedding. She was even mad at me when I missed one of the sessions. It wasn’t really my fault. I had gotten a friend in the US to help buy our wedding rings and he sent it through someone visiting Nigeria. The plan was to meet the person at the airport, collect the rings and head to church but the guy ended up being an old friend from school; so I hung out with him for a while and helped him settle in at his hotel. Funmi said I was taking the counselling with some form of levity.
I
told her we had all we needed for a good home: Love for each other and the
Spirit of God to guide us, there was no way we could fail. Besides, every
marriage is unique and we didn’t really need to follow other people’s
definition of it to be successful.
I still
remember her response “Where no counsel
is, the people fall: but in the multitude of counselors there is safety”
I
didn’t see what I did wrong but to avoid trouble, I apologized and told
her I would buckle up.
Our wedding
day was beautiful, it was all I had planned and hoped to give to Funmi…I just
wanted her to be very happy and indeed, she was.
It
all happened so fast after we got married, things went from good to better and everything I touched
turned to gold.
In 3 years, we already built our own house and I had started my own
company…lines were falling upon us in pleasant places.
I was able to convince
my wife to resign from her banking job and I sent her to Harvard Business School
for her MBA. I could afford the tuition; I was also able to visit her at least
once every 2 months for the 2-year duration.
She
had brought so much joy into my life and I just wanted to equip her for where
life was taking us as a family. I kept running into favor everywhere I turned
and I knew it had something to do with Funmi’s prayers…Ah! Funmi can pray…she
would go on and on for hours. I would hear her mentioning my name and
endeavors, committing everything into God’s hands.
We decided not to rush to have kids so we could enjoy each other before adding
the responsibilities of parenthood, about 2 years into the marriage we started
to try.
Funmi
was beginning to get worried but I told her not to stress herself as
companionship was the first reason for marriage and we had that. My mum on the
other hand would not let us rest…she kept bugging me and at a point she started
to talk to my wife about it.
One of my reasons for sending my wife abroad for
her Masters was to get my mum off her case…I figured it would be a smart way of
diffusing the brewing tension, if my wife was not within reach.
There
was a time during one of my visits that we thought “it” had happened but my
wife informed me after I got back to Nigeria, that it was false hope. I could
tell she was really disappointed but I encouraged her that as soon as she was
done with school, and we were back together, everything would work out fine.
My
wife returned with her MBA, and got a very juicy offer with a multinational
consulting firm. I advised her not to take the offer because I wanted her to
take things easy and rest for a while as it would enhance our chances of
getting pregnant. After all, it wasn’t as if she needed the money for anything.
Pastor
Fred was not one to be afraid of such issues because his own wife waited almost
10 years before they had their first child…he would just encourage us from time
to time not to let our faith shake.
“God has never failed…He has done it before,
He will do it again. I have seen Him do this time and time again. Bro Niran,
rest assured that it will end in celebration. There are children you just have
to wait for…check in the Bible; children so great, their parents had to wait
for their birth” He told me on our 6th wedding anniversary when
they visited us.
I
never actually got worried until after the 6th year of our wedding…I
tried to hide my worries from my wife because I knew I was the only support she
had.
My
mum had suggested all sorts of Prayer Mountains and ministries. She even wanted
us to undergo “deliverance” and was bringing the heat to my wife.
“Mummy, I am praying, and I will not stop
until my joy is full. I have committed this into God’s hands and I know He will
answer me. He always does. I believe in taking my case up with God and My kind of Christianity does not
subscribe to the ministry of prayer-mediators. I know my God and I know His word” was the
statement that caused a rift between my mum and Funmi; when my mum wanted to
force her to go see a prophet in Ibadan. Funmi had visited her, as usual, (my mum didn’t like coming to Lagos, so we did most of the visits) and had taken some groceries and money (monthly allowance) to her but the visit ended in my wife crying all the way back to Lagos.
My
mum felt insulted that she could not make my wife change her mind and returned
the things brought for her. She said she wanted grandchildren and not “Bournvita”
and Milk.
I had
to go to Ibadan to talk to my mum…I didn’t like how she treated my wife and she
was not picking my calls. I started by apologizing for whatever my wife did; then made her see what she did wrong. I reminded her that as a child of God, she should always let her words be seasoned with salt.
She
"indirectly" said she was sorry (typical Yoruba mother) and started the emotional
blackmail all over again. I also told her that we have been praying and we
believe God for a miracle
“All those
gentle-man prayers that you people do at your church? Is that what you call
prayer? You need prayers that have fire in them…prayers that God cannot ignore.
It’s not as if I’m offering you concoctions, neither have I advised you to go
to the herbalist. I am only suggesting prayers. That was how I raised you, that
was the path I showed you...and I can never mislead you. I know places we can
go, where they call God and He answers” My mum respondedPART 5 PART 7
© 2016 Lanre Olagbaju All Rights Reserved
2 comments:
Thank you for this...I hope the next part won't b long before we read it. Thumbs up for a job well done
Next Part is up now
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